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clarcana: Projects

Ode to Ferric Chloride
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An Odd Oder

Ferric chloride, with the chemical formula FeCl3 (pronounced "fecal"), is my favourite reagent. What do I want for Christmas? Read on -

Please listen while I tell you of a chemical made from iron.
It far outshines others which staff here have their eye on.
Around the campus, high and low, there do folk abide,
in the dark about a one - that is ferric chloride.

For Solid State Devices hydrofluoric is the stuff,
they swill it round in buckets - can't ever get enough,
but for healthy teeth and stronger bones a formula's well tried,
what you need for them is ferric, the super cool chloride.

Wates is awash with alcohol: as brandy, gin or glue.
You cannot purchase there, I fear, a special type of brew:
it looks good, and does you good, cures the cross-eyed,
that king of drinks, make mine a pint, of ferric chloro-ide.

Estates and Buildings, as we know, likes to come and paint,
with undercoat and overcoat, it's any sort of taint,
and what they want in 'Changing Rooms' is to have them dyed,
in a colour oh so beautiful: our gorgeous, cute chloride.

Across in Finance Office, on Tippex do they thrive.
They sit with faces glum until the tanker can arrive,
but our mistakes, however, will never you misguide.
We take our papers whole and dunk 'em straight into chloride.

Far down below, in BB block, the Rude Mechanics toil.
Machines there run the faster for much lubricating oil.
While up on level 21, when you dare to step inside,
upon the floor your feet will slip - we wax it with chloride.

So gather round to give three cheers, and sing its praises ferric.
No other scent can lend an air quite as atmospheric.
Throughout the land they laud it, from Dover to the Clyde,
the one, the only, truest etch, give us lovely chloride.